Jesse didn’t need to do anything. He barely took a step towards Rion’s room before he was surrounded. There was a moment of chaos while an entire team of nurses and security came to help. Jesse was swarmed.

They helped take Rion and then Jesse was left empty handed, standing outside Rion’s room. He turned around and joined Peter and Danny who were still standing in the hall.

“He really tried to jump?” was the first thing Danny asked, wide eyed. “Rion really… He actually…?”

“Yeah,” Jesse said, some of his previous satisfaction already dissipating. He was exhausted, his mood plummeting without warning. “Yeah, Rion wanted to jump. I went up for some fresh air and found him there. He asked me to help him up onto the ledge.”

“Holy shit,” Danny said, raking his fingers through his hair. “God… I can’t believe… Jesse, it’s so lucky you were there. He could have really… Rion could have…”

“You did the right thing,” Peter said. “Jesse… Thank you.”

The words were heartfelt. Peter clearly meant it. He didn’t seem surprised. He looked exactly how Jesse felt – tired.

“You don’t need to thank me,” Jesse said. “I couldn’t let him jump. That’s all there was to it.”

“Maybe,” Peter said. “But I’m still really grateful.”

“Yeah. Yeah, for sure,” Danny added, scrubbing at his face. “Geez… This is so messed up. This is… I need to sit down or something.”

“Yeah,” Peter agreed. “I think I need to go home.”

After everything that happened, Jesse could only nod in agreement. He was so tired and done. He didn’t want to think anymore. He didn’t want to have to imagine what Rion did or think about Amber being pregnant or…

He wanted to lie down and let his mind go blank. He wanted to scrub his head clear and try to sleep off these past few days.

“That’s probably a good idea,” Jesse said. “I’m exhausted…”

But even as he said it, Jesse caught sight of Celeste and Sarina who were just stepping out of the elevator down the hall. He blinked rapidly, not sure if he was imagining things.

What was Sarina doing here with Celeste?

“Hey!” Sarina called, spotting them and waving.

Both she and Celeste hurried over to them. Peter and Danny looked equally surprised to see them.

“Sarina?” Danny said and turned to Celeste. “What’s going on?”

“We wanted to talk to you about something,” Celeste said.

“What’s up with Rion?” Sarina added.

Even with the door to Rion’s room mostly closed, there was still one member of security standing outside the room. It was clear something was happening inside.

“Rion tried to jump off the hospital roof,” Jesse said, not mincing his words. “He’s suicidal.”

“What?” Celeste said, turning to him with wide eyes.

“No way!” Sarina added. “No! You’re kidding!”

“He’s not,” Peter said.

“Jesse just saved his life,” Danny said. “He carried him down from the roof.”

“Oh my God…” Celeste said, putting her hands to her mouth.

“Holy fuck,” Sarina added, balling up her hands into fists. “I can’t believe… Shit.”

“Let’s…go downstairs,” Peter said. “We can’t do much up here.”

They all got into the elevator and made their way down. It was a long, quiet ride, emotions thick.

None of them even bothered to try and get anything to eat or drink when they reached the main floor. They piled themselves in a corner table that was quickly becoming their regular spot.

“Rion really… He actually tried to jump?” Celeste said.

“I went up to the roof for air,” Jesse said. “He asked for a boost up onto the ledge.”

“He is so fucked,” Sarina spit out. “I hope they strap him down and send him to the fucking psych ward or whatever. I told him that people cared about him and that he was being fucking stupid.”

“…You did?” Danny said.

“Of course I did!” she snapped. “Have you seen what he did to himself? Diving into glass and getting all cut up for Noa… Who would be okay with that?!”

“You were the one who told him that Amber was pregnant,” Peter said.

Hearing it made Jesse’s stomach do an uncomfortable flip. He was trying not to think about it. He was doing his best to swallow his feelings down, but it was so, so hard…

“What?” Sarina said, frowning. “No, I… Didn’t he already know?”

“No,” Danny said, grimacing. “And because you said something about it, he asked me and Peter about it.  I told him it was true, and then…then the second we had our backs turned, he went up to the roof.”

“He… Wait…” Sarina said, some of the anger melting out of her expression. She looked more hurt, concerned, her face going pale. “Are you saying it’s my fault? I made him try to…?”

“No,” Peter was quick to interject. “No, that isn’t your fault. Rion isn’t in a good place and I think the shock of hearing that Amber was pregnant… I think it was too much for him to handle. Dr. Maes is with him right now, along with security. Rion will get help.”

“God, I hope so,” Sarina said, scrubbing at her face. “He is so fucked. All of this is just so messed up. I can’t even…”

Danny reached out to rub her shoulder. “I know. I get it. We all feel the same.”

“You said you wanted to talk to us about something,” Jesse said. “When you first showed up…”

Celeste turned to Sarina, who glanced back at her. They both looked uncomfortable and hesitant to speak up.

“We talked,” Sarina said.

“Sarina pointed out that…that everything Rion does is for Noa…” Celeste said.

“Noa?” Peter said.

“Yeah,” Sarina said. “This whole story about Rion…electrocuting Amber… He wouldn’t do that. That’s not Rion. It’s like the whole stupid friendship bracelet shit. Rion was covering for Noa. He must be doing it for him again.”

“You mean, you think Noa did something to Amber?” Danny asked.

“That doesn’t make sense,” Peter said. “My parents confirmed that Amber was found in the bathtub. Noa wouldn’t have been able to put her there.”

“You’re not getting it,” Sarina said. “Yeah, Rion probably… He probably put her in the tub. He’s fucked up enough to do something that crazy. But I’m saying he did it for Noa.”

Jesse was already uncomfortable, forcing himself to stay seated and listen to them talk about Amber and her death. It made his skin crawl. It made him nauseous. Coupled with the fresh knowledge that Amber was pregnant…

But at the mention of Noa, his thoughts stalled. He was lost, confused, and had to take a minute, sitting there blinking fast.

It made a strange sort of sense to Jesse. Rion and Noa had always been close. They stuck by each other, did everything together. The friendship bracelet situation was proof enough of Rion’s mindset. But now that he thought about it, there were other examples…

One more thing. It was always one more thing.

“Noa wouldn’t hurt Amber,” Peter said.

“I know he wouldn’t hurt Amber,” Sarina said, thumping her fist down on the table. “But something happened that Rion thought he had to fix. And if he did what he said he did… How does that fix anything?! It could only make things worse and he had to know that!”

“I don’t think… I don’t think Rion would’ve hurt Amber either,” Celeste said. “He loved Amber. They both loved Amber. If Rion did what he did to fix things somehow…that means he thought doing something horrible was the only answer… He would only do something like that for Noa. Right?”

“I hate that you’re making a weird amount of sense,” Danny said, pulling his hand away from Sarina to let his elbows rest on the table.

“Then…what did Noa do?” Jesse asked.

They fell silent.

It had to be something bad, didn’t it? It had to be something terrible. Because Rion wouldn’t have done something so insane otherwise.

But Noa wouldn’t do anything to hurt Amber either.

It didn’t make sense. It didn’t add up.

“We have to ask Noa,” Peter finally said.

“Didn’t you try that?” Jesse said. “Didn’t he already refuse to talk about it?”

“I have to keep trying until he’s ready to tell me,” Peter said. “We could ask Rion, but I doubt he’ll say anything and we might not even be able to visit anymore. The two of them are the only ones who know what really happened to Amber.”

“And Rion will blame himself no matter what, while Noa will go mute,” Sarina said bitterly. “I don’t think either one of them will ever talk.”

“I don’t think that’s true,” Peter said. “Because Rion already told us so much. Even if he’s blaming himself… We never would have learned what we did without him.”

“I don’t think anyone can keep that kind of secret forever,” Celeste said. “I think it hurts, emotionally. I think… I think that kind of thing is too much for anyone to keep to themselves.”

“I don’t know,” Sarina said. “Considering Rion just tried to jump off the roof… Like, fuck, if either one of them does something crazy like that, we’ll never have a chance to find out what really happened.”

“Maybe we shouldn’t know,” Jesse said.

Everyone turned to him.  He immediately felt stupid for bringing it up.

“What are you saying?” Danny asked. “You don’t want to know?”

“I do, but at the same time, I regret everything that we’ve already found out,” he said, looking down, taking a painful breath. “I used to imagine that…that it was some horrible accident. I never tried to think about how Amber died. I wanted it to be something like smoke inhalation. I didn’t want her to have suffered. But now I know she was pregnant… I know that she hit her head and was electrocuted in a bathtub… I don’t even know if she was alive or dead when she was electrocuted, and… I don’t want to think about it. Why would I want to know that Noa might have done something too? Every time I find out something new it gets worse and worse and worse.”

He was trying not to cry but his vision was blurred by tears. It was hard to hold them back and he had to suck in another harsh, painful breath of air.

“I know that it’s hard,” Peter said, putting hand on his arm. “And if you don’t want to know anything else, I understand. But I need to know. If I stop, I’ll be left wondering what happened for the rest of my life.”

“I know,” Jesse said. “I know that. I’m just so tired of it being one thing after another. And if we aren’t finding out something horrible then we have Rion trying to kill himself. I… I don’t know what to do anymore.”

“I don’t think there’s anything we can do,” Celeste said. “Other than try to understand…”

“Hey…”

Jesse turned along with the others to find Mr. Blum standing next to their table. He’d approached silently, still dressed in his winter coat. His face was pale, his eyes red and puffy from crying.

“Mr. Blum?” Peter said, getting to his feet.

When Peter got up, Jesse did too. It was reflex.

“I heard about what happened,” Mr. Blum said. “Jesse, they said you…you saved Rion…”

Jesse hadn’t expected to see Mr. Blum. He hadn’t been thinking about how everything might affect him. It wasn’t on his mind at all and now he felt lost.

“I guess so?” Jesse said weakly. His motivation for forcing Rion to live suddenly felt horribly selfish. “He… I grabbed him and brought him down…”

As he was talking, Mr. Blum walked over. And suddenly Jesse was pulled into a crushingly tight hug.

“Thank you. Jesse, thank you so much,” Mr. Blum said. “I almost lost him. You… I can’t thank you enough.”

Jesse was stunned. Slowly, hesitantly, he returned the hug.

He didn’t know what to say. He didn’t know what to do. He didn’t know how to respond. He was totally caught off guard and all he could do was silently hug the man in return.

An unfamiliar feeling filled him. He didn’t have a name for it.

When Mr. Blum pulled back, he was teary eyed and shaky. Jesse felt the same, blinking fast, trying to get his emotions under control.

“Can we talk?” Mr. Blum said. “Can I get you a coffee or something?”

“Sure,” Jesse said, glancing at the others. “I’ll be back in a minute.”